Breaking News

By Jacob K.

I am Jacob reporting in, there are missing Alpha Emporium supplies! There are tracks leading outside into the woods on Alpha property. The police have not been able to find the crook, but the tracks don’t appear to be human tracks! The police think that they could be fake feet.

As we go inside, we can see that the building looks ransacked and there are scratches on the walls, so now the police definitely think it was not human. The kids are starting to go crazy because they can not spend their Alphas on anything. The police think that a bear is to blame, but when they follow the tracks, they disappear in the middle of the woods.

*commercial break* Tune back in later tonight but now we look at some weird news about a pig that was hit by a tree and sent up flying. Some people think it is a cover up by the government to hide that pigs can fly.

Now, back to the missing Alpha emporium supplies. It looks to the police that a huge, 20 foot tall, alien bear had taken it. Now an interview with an eye-witness.

Jacob: “Why do you think the bear stole the supplies?”

Sher: “Maybe because he wanted the candy or the Baby Yoda. I put my money on the Baby Yoda”.

Jacob: “How hairy was the bear? This is a very important question.”

Sher: “The bear was bald with no skin, and it was the scariest thing I’ve ever seen.“

Jacob: “Now for the last question: Why did the tracks end?”

Sher: “It was carried into the mothership.”

Tune back in next time for more totally real, definitely not fake news.

Jacob K. is a Level 1 student who likes his iPad a lot. He also likes physics and is always worried about writing.